The Time Has Come My Little Friends To Talk Of Many Things... Like Global Warming!

Let me preface this by stating that the time has come my little friends to talk of many things! I am going to break down the story of the Walrus and the Carpenter... All in terms of Global Warming! 

The Walrus and the Carpenter (Or The Corporations and the American People)
Or, The Story of the Curious Oysters (Or the story of the Apathetic Politicians)

The sun was shining on the sea
Shining with all his might
He did his very best to make
The billows (of soot) smooth and bright (like the earth, getting very bright)
And this was odd because it was
The middle of the night (because of the greenhouse gases!)

The Walrus and the Carpenter (or Corporate Greed and the American People!)
Were walking close at hand
The beach was wide 
From side to side (From sea to shining sea)
But much too full of sand (aka, pollution/greenhouse gases) 

"Mr. Walrus," said the Carpenter (The carpenter is the American public)
"My brain begins to perk (The american people have become aware)
We'll sweep this clear in 'alf a year (the problem of efficiency, and pollution) 
If you don't mind the work"

"Work?! The time has come," the Walrus said (The walrus are corporations)
"To talk of other things
Of shoes and ships and sealing wax (we can't hurt business with "green" costs, and also, here are a bunch of consumer goods, buy some walmart crap)
Of cabbages and kings (ahh, of course kings refers to the government, its not corporations' job, is the job of other countries!) 
And why the sea is boiling hot
And whether pigs have wings (because of course global warming only exists as a figment of Al Gore's imagination)
Calloo-Callay (no translation)
No work today!
We're cabbages and kings"

Oh, uh, Oysters, come and walk with us (Oysters are Congress, and our government)
The day is warm and bright
A pleasant walk
A pleasant talk
Would be a sheer delight
Yes, and should we get hungry on the way
We'll stop and, uh, have a bite? (of course buying off politicians) 

But Mother Oyster winked her eye (Mother Oyster... Al Gore!)
And shook her hairy head
She knew too well
This was no time to leave her Oyster bed (don't go with the corporations)
"The sea is nice,
Take my advice
And stay right here," Mum said (stay in congress, and do your job)

Yes, yes, of course, of course, but, uh, ha, ha
The time has come, my little friends
To talk of other things
Of shoes and ships and sealing wax
Of cabbages and kings
And why the sea is boiling hot
And whether pigs have wings, ha ha
Callo-Callay
Come, run away
With cabbages and kings! (and of course congress ran, along with a lot of the american public for a few years) 

Well, now, uh, let me see 
Ah, a loaf of bread is
What we chiefly need! (not a carbon tax... give us money! We'll fix it with technology)
Listen, how 'bout some pepper and salt and vinegar, eh?
Well, yes, yes, splendid idea, ha ha!
Very good, indeed
Now, if your ready, Oysters, dear.
We can begin the feed.
Feed?!

Oh, yes, the time has come, my little friends
To talk of food and things
Of peppercorns and mustard seeds
And other seasonings!
We'll mix 'em all together
In a sauce that's fit for kings (a big sauce of bullshit)
Calloo-Callay
We'll eat today
Like cabbages and kings! (Like China and the other undeveloped polluters!)

I, uh, weep for you. I (hic), oh excuse me
I deeply sympathise
For I've enjoyed your company, oh much more
Than you realize
Little Oysters? Little Oysters?

But answer, there came none
And this was scarcely odd because
They'd been eaten
Every one! (And then it was too late, and global warming couldn't be solved... The chance had passed)

URRRRRRRG!
The time has come!!! (and if you remember, the carpenter goes postal in this scene and runs around after the walrus with a clever). 

Think About It....

So! The time has come American Public... Either you can open your eyes now, and we can work WITH corporations and stop the thoughts of apathy, or we can let corporations get lazy. Lucky for us, that story was the story of about four years ago. Since then, public opinion has been swaying MASSIVELY towards the idea that going "green" is healthy for america from a cost/efficiency standpoint, as well as a national security standpoint. Of course preventing global climate change is always a plus too. 

And now corporations are realizing that they can make a bunch of money by going green. Not only in fuel cost savings, but it helps their public image. So its a win win for corporations. That is why the problem will get solved, I actually have a lot of faith. Many props to Al Gore!

And, you all should join Al at www.wecanlsolveit.org, and join the facebook group We Can Solve The Climate Crisis. 

Thanks,
Guthrie